Telling It As It Is

I have expected the phone call from a friend, I know he always call whenever I go hermit-ing.

I have been avoiding quite a number of people, for many reasons, some I have stated in some of the previous posts. And I was very sure that someone will eventually call me to advise me; to forgive and forget, etc etc.

Much as I expected the phone call, but when I talked to him, only then I realised how deeply I was hurt. Tears pooled in the eyes, voice quivered, it took a lot of self control for it felt like I was at the verge of breaking down when describing the feeling of betrayal and misplaced trust and loyalty. I resolved not to put myself is such situation again, ever.

After telling all that has been bottled up, I am not sure I feel much better but at least, I can say that I am satisfied that someone heard what is in my heart and my mind.

How it goes from there, it doesn't matter anymore. I don't care, I won't care and I can't care. Definitely. I should not waver despite whatever people says. I can be stubborn and when I decided to be stubborn, I am really really stubborn, hahaha. Come what may in the way and I will just go and collide head to head with it. I won't treasure people who don't know how to treasure me back. Hahaha.